The San Jose Sharks emo social media manager is not okay (I promise)

Someone should really check on the San Jose Sharks’ Twitter manager.

If you so happen to be a fan of one of the NHL’s seven teams who weren’t invited to the playoff bubble in 2020, it very well might feel like you haven’t watched a meaningful game of hockey in ages.

Sure, the rest of the league reconvened in a pair of satellite campuses and played out an adjusted version of the playoffs, but if your team was one of those unfortunate few who were left out, why on earth would you watch that? Talk about rubbing salt into an open wound.

And to make matters worse, we’re already into December, and the exact details of the 2020-21 season – which certainly won’t have any games played in the 2020 calendar year – are still up in the air. Will NHL fans get to see a full 82 game season? How about 60? Fine, I guess I’d settle for 48 games, but that’s really pushing it; I am a fan of a very bad hockey team in this scenario.

If you fall into this category, I could understand getting a tad down in the dumps. Heck, as a hockey blogger explicitly tasked with covering the league, this Fall hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park, but hey, no matter how down in the dumps you might get about the current(?) season’s prospects, at least you aren’t the social media manager of the San Jose Sharks, because that (gender-neutral) dude is clearly going through some stuff.

Now, before you even ask, no, I do not know who runs the Sharks’ Twitter account – for all I know, it could be the team’s mascot, S.J. Sharkie. Could I look it up? Probably, but why bother? It’s not particularly relevant anyway. For all I know, this person has a happy life, a great family, and is just feeling a tad down in the dumps about a lack of hockey in this, the most hockey-y month of the year. But when you post a ‘top songs of 2020’ Spotify parody meme littered with mid-2000s emo songs, I kind of doubt it.

No, that hypothetical playlist was a cry for help if I’ve ever seen one.

Need proof? Check out the tracklist, for goodness sake! ‘I Miss You’ by Blink-182. That song is sad. It’s also funny because of how Tom DeLonge pronounces words, but mostly, it’s sad. ‘Screaming Infidelities’? Also sad, maybe even more so when you consider Dashboard Confessional is a band with only one member. ‘Here Without You’ and ‘Chasing Cars’ are also sad, though neither is exactly a traditional emo band in the true ‘Vans Warped Tour’ sort of way.

But song number two. ‘I’m Not Okay (I Promise)’ by My Chemical Romance. If that isn’t a cry for help, I don’t know what is.

I mean, come on, it’s literally in the title. I’m. Not. Okay. What more is there to say?

They literally promise that was the case.

So, my dear reader, if you’ll allow me to, I’d like to address whoever runs the San Jose Sharks Twitter account personally. (Probably) Sharkie, I know life can get you down sometimes. As a fully grown emo kid, I can 100 percent relate, but just know hockey is eventually going to come back. Will it be before Christmas? Probably not, Honestly, anything before Valentine’s Day would be an absolute blessing, but that doesn’t mean you have to fret. There are still re-runs, Youtube highlight reels, and even NHL 21 to keep you occupied until the season opens up. And hey, it sounds like Evander Kane might fight one, or even both of the Paul brothers; that might be fun. So, in the words of one of your favorites, Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance, there are plenty of reasons to “carry on“.